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July 29th, 2012, 16:41
Originally Posted by Damian View Post
I dont think that it leads to less divorce, all i see from my limited looks into peoples lives is that a lack of a leader in the marriage resulats in divorce(be it male or female). In our society it is assumed that it is almost wrogn for the man to take the lead, but in most cultures tahat let the man lead they are happier to stay together.

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Conflict is resolved rather easily in those cases when a leader is present. In countries where this is the norm for the male have less divorce. I dont think that social suicide is enough justification for divorce rates to be less than 5000% of the western cultures.
It is when divorce can make you a pariah in the society where no one would want to marry you again, because you've been used up. In many ultra-religious places, this is the case and sometimes women who get beaten do not even want to divorce because of all the consequences there would be for her.

In Western countries divorce has been made easier because women are treated unfairly otherwise. I have friends from Nigeria who say their parents used to tell them these things all the time on how the white people divorce a lot, but now that they came to the UK they realize the differences in why and how. A friend of someone I know, his father stabbed his mother, which almost killed her and that was the last straw which made her separate from her husband, not even divorce!

If a woman asked for divorce in some societies, she needs the husband's permission for it too unless there is something very bad going on.

You take one data point and create lots of assumptions, but you do not look at every side of the argument and just one which is presented to you.
Divorce, abortion and all the other social issues that you see as very politically relevant in the US are in fact thing that people have always wanted to do, but if they did it before they would get shunned, exiled,…

A very extreme example would be the Amish people who would exile you from using any modern technology. You would say that's stupid, why shouldn't you be able to use modern tech? Well, because modern technology is what has lead the world to become this pit of sin.

Again, that's a false supposition. You first have to show that people didn't sin before and so on.

Same with divorce, people who wanted to divorce before couldn't out of fear of being shunned, beaten harder and in many cases, the court wouldn't allow for it so easily.

My mom knows someone in India who was arranged to marry someone 30 years older than her. She wasn't happy at all, but couldn't get a divorce. It's not done in those societies. So you say it's because there is no dominant male that people divorce, instead look at why people do NOT divorce. You'll see that it's not only because they're all so happy. There are many forces involved.

You even have to add to this that in Western countries the person (usually the woman) who gets to take charge of the kids gets a lot of help and the other person has to pay alimony. In countries like Nigeria, if you're a woman who wants to divorce and take the children away that's possible, but you don't get half the assets, the house, the car, alimony and so on, you have to go and take care of you and your kids on your own now. Your husband will easily remarry someone else who he can cheat on or beat and you will have to fend for yourself.

Nigeria is a very religious country by the way with about half the population being Muslim and the other half Christian. A massive percentage are churchgoers, unlike Western countries. Just to show the difference in way of life.

So basically, there is no protection in many of those countries for divorcees and their kids, which is yet another reason why people in Europe do divorce more.

You can say that there not being a dominant person contributes to all of these factors and you might even be able to show it in some places, but saying that THAT IS the reason for why people divorce more is really not the way to go.
You also have to consider that you would also find marriages which end up in divorce in Europe because someone is taking charge too, so it's a very difficult thing to say.

EDIT: sorry for the long post.
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