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January 3rd, 2007, 17:09
And to really ring out the old year:

Supposedly these are actual headlines during 2006:

Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
Imagine that!


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No, really?


Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!


Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Getting a little personal, aren't we?

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!

War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
You think?!

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!]

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge


New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!


Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Taste like chicken?

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Wouldn't it be easier to get them a GED?

Hospitals are Sued by Seven Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!

And the winner is….

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
; Did I read that sign right?

Where there's smoke, there's mirrors.
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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