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February 15th, 2007, 16:39
Of them both, I like the comedian better!

I always hated Ace Ventura tho, I can watch it for about twenty minutes max. Jerry is never really annoying to me, but Ace is a walking annoyance imho.

"PELTS"


Another entry in Showtime's "Masters of Horror" line of short films. Think Tales from the Crypt, with each episode done by an acclaimed director of the macabre. This one is done by Dario Argento, and is easily the bloodiest and most NPM (nudity per minute) of all the episodes so far. It even outdoes Takashi Miike's "Imprint", not in sheer cruelty of course, but in the gore and sex department it surpasses it. It's like he's trying for some sort of penance after the truly mediocre, out of character crime dramas "The Card Player" and "Do You Like Hitchcock". Well, he achieves that here in spades, as even my jaded self was cringing at some of the stuff taking place. The 70's rock star "Meatloaf" seems to take on many a supporting role in these types of films, but lands the lead role here as a greedy and perverted furrier. He's a slimeball basically (which might I add he plays quite well), and will stop at nothing to get the stripper of his dreams. Even if it's making her a fur coat out of a bunch of enchanted raccoons. Seriously.

Yep, it's magical 'coons guarding an ancient place of power, with the prerequisite old crone living in a shack near them, filled with dire warnings and so forth. Cute little fellas, I might add. Now, while I will concede that raccoons are truly underrated animals when it comes to their great looks, I do have a hard time seeing a furrier getting all too excited about coon furs. The people in this flick in general are totally aghast at raccoon furs, and it's a little unbelievable. But then again, I dont know much about the fur trade, perhaps 'coons are the meat of the industry. All in all, I enjoyed this little hour-long video nasty for what it is - a little bit of brain fast-food between serious movies. Nice cover too.

Just dont watch this one with the kiddies, or for that matter, anyone who is sensitive to boobs and blood!
Last edited by xSamhainx; February 15th, 2007 at 18:09.
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