The most retarded thing in games. you can think of

Ok sorry for the ranty headline, but I'm in the edge of rage here. Let me explain. I bought Splinter cell: the double agent today.. What a disaster it became. I know I didn't read the reviews, but c'mon all the previous 3 (!) games were absolutely fantastic games in their genre...

Lets ignore all the game design decions like the traffic lighs on Sam's suit and see whats really retarded. Ok first of all the game doesn't support widescreens. How can it be these days? Luckily i got around by tweaking the ini-file. What really makes the double agent one of the all time retarded games ever are the controls. For some reason (!!?!) developers felt that players shouldn't be allowed to remap their mouse buttons!!! Why on earth did they do that?! I always bind "jump" on my mouse no matter the game. now these folks want to me use what they think is best. I'm so frustraited because the game is nearly unplayable to me. I could get over the flawed gamedesign, horribe engine choise and crappy traffic lights if they just allowed me to custom my controls! Don't tell me to patch my game, since I already did it with no success.

So now I told mine, whats yours?

No joystick control implemented in Freelancer.

First, I thought, this could not be true.

Second, I was wrapped in fright as I indeed found out that it WAS true.


Another thing I found quite retarded was the cliché in Starlancer : West vs. East. I first thought that this cannot be true, to actually clutch zu some "ye olde stereotype" like THIS. Don't people have BRAINS ?

The 'medal' system in Medal of Honor Airborne. They went to pains to make everything look, feel and sound as realistic as possible ... then put in a system that rewards you for killing a certain number of enemies in a certain amount of time with a weapon - but giving you weapon upgrades mid-battle.

That's right - you could be firing from cover against 20 Nazis and suddenly get a scope on that BAR! Or a double clip on the Tommy ...

non-configurable hotkeys are my number one gripe

on the game content side:
i have mentioned this before, but it's something that has always drove me nuts. A king, a lord, some very powerful and wealthy being needs me to save the world. They give me my divine mission, and cut me loose.... dressed in a loincloth, wielding an old rusty dagger.

I spend the next days stomping rats and going thru garbage bins trying to scrape up enough to get some equipment so I can like, you know, save the world and stuff. Youre only entrusting me with the fate of the world, how about kickin me down a meager 100gp fer crissake!

I'm still laughing about Ultima IX's control scheme. It's totally retarded - pressing two keys and the mousebutton in order to walk backward? Hah - and the same critics who hated Gothic's controls didn't say a word about Ultima IX.
Or Evil Islands and the inventory you can't use while in the gameworld. Harhar.
Lionheart and its ridiculuos difficulty.

And let's not forget: Thief "3" and Deus Ex "2". Boy, these games are retarded, with their micro-levels and their stupid stories.

* No centering force on force feedback joystick in X3: Reunion.
* No mouse support on the PC port of Resident Evil IV.
* The inventory in NWN2. How hard can it be to make the damn thing sortable by item type?
* The Volcano level in Far Cry, with the sheer quantity of enemies making it (1) mind-boggling hard and (2) slow as a slide show (on most computers).
* Fenthick. 'Nuff said.
* Starforce. 'Nuff said.
* The "rogue" path in Planescape: Torment.
* The stun-locking wildlife in Gothic 3.

Hindukönig said:

And let's not forget: Thief "3" and Deus Ex "2". Boy, these games are retarded, with their micro-levels and their stupid stories.

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Still, Thief 3 has the best horror level I've encountered in any game. Shalebridge Cradle hit at just the right moment too, just when you're starting to feel pretty good about being Garrett.

(In fact, IMO those two games only have the rep they have because they're so much weaker than their predecessors; compared to your average random game, both are pretty good really.)

My gripe about a particular control scheme standard - how the smeg did WASD become the default for movement keys? ESDF is much better suited to the task, because it gives you 3 additional hotkey options on the left side (W, A, Z) and still everything on the right side of the keyboard. (A)SDF is also the default left hand position for 10 finger typing, so you get the small, nifty bumper on the F key for quick positioning of your fingers.

In almost every 3D game I have to change my movement keys to what they should have been in the first place (ESDF), having to change at least three other keys in the process because of that. Gah!

Seriously, who came up with that?!

(Ok, changing the default keys is necessary most of the time anyway, but I'm just saying )

Prime Junta said:

* Starforce. 'Nuff said.

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QFT

Prime Junta said:

Still, Thief 3 has the best horror level I've encountered in any game. Shalebridge Cradle hit at just the right moment too, just when you're starting to feel pretty good about being Garrett.

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Heh, I wanted to write how much I hate that level in my former posting, but I thought it wouldn't be necessary. The Cradle level has a big problem (for me), and it's similiar to the Ravenholm scene in Half Life 2 - it just doesn't fit into the game. Yes, the Cradle was creepy, but IMHO, it has nothing to do with the Thief universe, neither in story nor in level design. Furthermore, the mission design didn't make much sense.
Perhaps I just can't take "dead little girls" serious any more. They are overused now, and Thief "3" didn't do anything better - the game did it even worse.

(In fact, IMO those two games only have the rep they have because they're so much weaker than their predecessors; compared to your average random game, both are pretty good really.)

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I don't agree, and I never will.

@ "i don't agree, and i never will."
its that closemindedness which is the very reason for their less than glowing reputations. not that their without problems, but ultimately its the reason why i hate fans, and have never desired fame. somehow fans, ie fanatics always have this level of posessiveness associated with the things they love whether it be a sports team, actor, or gaming franchise. do people go spit on a picasso because they don't like it? sure sports will always have a gutteral level of appreciaton, but i see no reason for games and other artistic creations to suffer this. the developers put in thousands upon thousands of hours, and even if some gamer somehow played a game for longer than it took to make it, it still wouldn't mean anything. but the remnents of the "oldest profession" still lurk in even the most unlikely of purchases. my biggests gripes though usually aren't with gamers and the creativity stiffling crusades, but with the music industrial complex. but yeah i don't usually get to bothered as i have plenty of great music and games to play, but it still is laughable when i see critics (of the non constructive kind) in action.

Um ... I will never agree with Prime Junta's opinion, because I actually played both games and found them to be not just bad successors, but bad games in general. What's your problem with that?

BTW, both Thief: Deadly Shadows and Deus Ex: Invisible War have good reputation thanks to the masses of reviews which gave the games at least 8/10 points - when somebody says the games have a "bad rep" then he's just referring to the forums, and forums count nothing in the industry.

Aside from having to pay ridiculous amounts for weapons and armor to save the lives of the self same merchants, finding those things on rats or other animals is just plain silly!!

Ever wondered, why *all* zombies and mummies in Gothic 3 are former human males? And why are they fighting with sticks? And the skeletons are yawning from time to time. Pretty retarded, if you ask me.

my problem is that it confilcts with the adage never say never

Alrik Fassbauer said:

No joystick control implemented in Freelancer.

First, I thought, this could not be true.

Second, I was wrapped in fright as I indeed found out that it WAS true.

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Most joysticks these days come with software where you can emulate keystrokes to your joystick. Sometimes they aren't very good though for specific games as I found out with NWN.

txa1265 said:

... then put in a system that rewards you for killing a certain number of enemies in a certain amount of time with a weapon - but giving you weapon upgrades mid-battle.

That's right - you could be firing from cover against 20 Nazis and suddenly get a scope on that BAR! Or a double clip on the Tommy ...

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Y'now, in a similar vein I've always hate the new CRPGs which instantly level you up. All the games reflect that now.

The way we played there was no levelling up in a dungeon. You had to return to the trainer.

Games like Wizardry, Bard's Tale and the Gold Box games always did this as well as it was much easier to implement in a cRPG than PnP. Basically you abstracted it between games in PnP

xSamhainx said:

non-configurable hotkeys are my number one gripe

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Yep, mine too. If I don't like the keys and can't reconfig the keys forget it, I won't play.

Arhu said:

My gripe about a particular control scheme standard - how the smeg did WASD become the default for movement keys? ESDF is much better suited to the task...

Seriously, who came up with that?!

QFT

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big ditto on that. except, I change my keys to the good 'ol Arrow keys. That's why the arrow keys were invented: for gaming and to save your letter keys. I refuse to guide my character around with my left hand.

The Left and Right arrows are for turning. If I find I am forced to turn with my mouse and can't with my keys forget it. Anachronix is guilty for that and its why I won't play it. Strafing is an alternate function for targeting!

I was actually noted for being oldskool at the Univerisity's network gaming nights for this. The kids surprised me (I remember when there was no up and down arrows. We used A and Z for that and called them "Starblazer" controls.)

Hindukönig said:

I'm still laughing about Ultima IX's control scheme. It's totally retarded - pressing two keys and the mousebutton in order to walk backward? Hah - and the same critics who hated Gothic's controls didn't say a word about Ultima IX.

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I love Ultima IX's control scheme and regularly reconfigure FPS to move forward with the Right Mouse button. Seriously, who moves backwards anyway?

Gothic's control scheme make it unplayable. Sorry that upsets you.

Lucky Day said:

I love Ultima IX's control scheme and regularly reconfigure FPS to move forward with the Right Mouse button. Seriously, who moves backwards anyway?

Gothic's control scheme make it unplayable. Sorry that upsets you.

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Huh? Why should that upset me? Just because you're strange?

One thing that irritates me to no end are games that are far too short for their price.

Kings Bounty and IWD:Heart of Winter come to mind. I played that last one in about 10 hours.

I think they should price games at about $1 for every hour of gameplay with a cap at $50.

Hindukönig;44648 said:

Huh? Why should that upset me? Just because you're strange?

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probably.

Lucky Day said:

I think they should price games at about $1 for every hour of gameplay with a cap at $50.

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Cool - I could get MoH:AA and both expansions and Call of Duty and its expansion and Call of Duty 2 and Medal of Honor Airborne and Bioshock ... all together for less than $50!

As for leveling, I don't like the complete lack of leveling control in jRPG's, but that is how they are built. But I definitely agree with no in-dungeon leveling in western RPG's. I was surprised that I could do it in D&D Tactics - I obviously chose not to.

My most retarded thing: I've said it before, but of course that isn't going to stop me--what is it with the health potions thing in newer games? I don't mind having a few around for emergencies, but the constant swilling of some mysterious liquid that's apparently a magic-based human fix-a-flat is annoying as hell.
I think the worst game I've ever played for this was Lionheart--I remember trying to make it through the second half(the one where the devs had just found out they were all fired, I believe) with ONLY 200 potions in my inventory...totally retarded.

Which game was it - Kult Heretic Kingdoms? - where you had inexhaustible field healing, but it would fix you up to a certain amount and your total health would continue to dwindle until you rested or died? Cool way around it.