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Default Gamasutra - Why I Had Sex With The Alien

December 10th, 2007, 01:57
A little weekend wildness over at Gamasutra, where they've posted an article about Bioware's implementation of alien lesbian sex in Mass Effect:
Count me in the camp of people who was disappointed by Mass Effect. I expected to be lured into a rich, alien world, and seduced by the exotic races and intricate politics that BioWare had crammed into the story.

But what I got was less a classic like Knights of the Old Republic and more like - well, you know when you start a cheap paperback and you just can’t put the damn thing down, and the writing’s sloppy and there are typos and the cover’s cheesy, but you just have to get to the end? And the end still doesn’t knock you out? I could go on about how the incredible hype and AAA-prestige that latches onto titles like this blinds critics and fans to the not-quite-awesome product that finally hits the stores.

But let’s not talk about that. Instead, let’s talk about that girl-girl alien sex scene.
Didn't that soft-core sex scene in the clip – come on, you've seen it - take you back to late-night Cinemax? Did Emmanuelle ever make it into outer space? But that said, how much does it suck that they leaked this early? The gay relationships in Knights of the Old Republic, Jade Empire and that D & D game that nobody played, Temple of Elemental Gay Marriage, were all snookered in under the scenes. I beat KOTOR and didn’t even know that Juhani, one of the female characters, swung that way. (I was too busy trying to mack on Batista.)…
… Anyway, when I got my copy of Mass Effect, I rolled a female character. Hey, stop looking at me like that! Given a choice, I always play women, and the female Commander Shepard is voiced by the inimitable Jennifer Hale. If you don’t play as a woman, and specifically as a kick-ass renegade woman, you’re missing some of the most entertaining dialogue of the year…
…Let me also add that the NPCs in this game are a major step back for BioWare. They never talk with you in the field, aside from a couple generic lines about how “This building is very cold” or “This planet is very hot.” The extended get-to-know-you conversations I’m used to never happen. And as for flirting? Back in the day, when an NPC had a thing for you, they were subtle about it. A hint here, a jealous comment there, a few tests to make sure you would do nothing but agree with their every suggestion – and whammo, the screen went black and you got lucky.

But Mass Effect doesn’t have time for that. Your romance options basically hand themselves up on a platter: the first time you get to talking with them, they start dribbling about how impressive and intriguing you are and, hey, space is lonely and sometimes it’s fun to share a bunk. In fact, they don’t even say anything that romantic. They basically just say, “Keep talking to me and someday we’ll have that sex scene you saw on YouTube.”
More information.

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December 10th, 2007, 01:57
come on, you've seen it
Omg, she has an alien probing device!

Trust me, most of the names I have been called you can't translate in any language…they're not even real words as much as a succession of violent images.
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December 10th, 2007, 09:32
Hey, am I the only one that's really not very interested in this sort of thing— especially when these romances seem to be triggered by just saying anything that will please the NPC you're courting? Try that in real life and they will think you're a goddamn wuss without a personal opinion. Wussies don't get laid.
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December 10th, 2007, 10:11
Ahahahaha, I have to admit, the sex video looks completely lame.

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December 10th, 2007, 11:05
Oh God, now that I've watched it, I have to try this purely for comedic value. That was hilarious. Ready for round two?

That scene would so not work with a straight hetero-sexual romance, hehe.
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December 10th, 2007, 12:21
PUHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA, PUHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA, Bioware can't even do a sex scene right! Gawd, those developers are such a loosers, I guess they don't have much experiance of ummmmmmmmmm aliens having sex…. uhhhhh. LOL.
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December 10th, 2007, 16:01
Ermm …. not sure if I actually SHOULD try to clarify but what the hell.

The Asari are mono-gendered (they're all female) and can mate with any gender from basically any sentient species. Physical contact is not really required for the Asari because the mating ritual is a mental bonding (akin to the Vulcan mind-melt from Star Trek).

Ermmm … don't know why I felt compelled to explain, but there you have it.

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December 10th, 2007, 16:36
Originally Posted by fatBastard() View Post
The Asari are mono-gendered (they're all female) and can mate with any gender from basically any sentient species. Physical contact is not really required for the Asari because the mating ritual is a mental bonding (akin to the Vulcan mind-melt from Star Trek).
So, Bioware created an entire race's biology and physiology for the sole purpose of facilitating a lesbian relationship. That's pretty sad.

That clip is downright embarrassing to watch. Not that I have anything against such a potential relationship, but that was really, really badly done.

You know the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts, they alter the facts to fit their views, which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs altering.
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December 10th, 2007, 16:55
Cheesy stuff, but it's reached and pleased it's target audience and no doubt is making a lot of money for the good doctors and one assumes, EA. That's pretty much the major point for them these days I guess.

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December 10th, 2007, 17:25
And Bioware fans blast The Witcher for hitting below the belt, which it does, but at least it does it with a sense of humor. That scene is just creepy.

Bioware is now sandwiched between Microsoft and EA… the threesome from Hell.
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December 10th, 2007, 17:26
You wouldn't think that anyone in the world would consider this whole thing a major selling point for the game, would you? I mean, come on! It's a good laugh, but is this "alien sex scene" really making monkey for "the good doctors?" I doubt it! And would Bioware include this specifically to hype the shit out of the game? I'm not so sure, but maybe I'm not so cynical as I used to be.
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December 10th, 2007, 17:47
Well I'm glad-cynicism is bad when it becomes a knee-jerk response, and that's a fault I have. But I do think the "leak" of this scene pre-release, and it's inclusion in the first place is primarily to increase sales and make the title stand out in people's minds ( i.e. hype in its purest form)as opposed to being part of some greater artistic vision for the game or something. I could be wrong, of course. It could be the one factor that makes the game meaningful to someone somewhere.

btw, like the typo—"making monkey(s) for the good doctors"..a little freudian slip?

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December 10th, 2007, 18:42
I can actually understand "leaking" such a scene and adding to the hype. It translates directly into money and that's good! Things become a little more sinister when you start thinking about whether they intentionally adding this for this sole purpose. I'm pretty sure it wasn't; the same scene can be played with a guy, after all. It's just something that can be milked and why shouldn't they?

It's how the world works. Economy and markets and all that. But someone that buys or plays it only to get to that scene, naw. That's a little too far-fetched. (On the other hand, there are bound to exist a few).

And yes, my monkey slip just betrayed my unhealthy love for monkeys ever since I played the Monkey Island games.
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December 10th, 2007, 21:27

Damn. There I was thinking this article was about Giger's Alien, and I really, really wondered how the author survived to tell about it, and then… the Muppet show.
Why does this game have to look like Farscape?
Can I have KotOR back? Please?

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December 10th, 2007, 21:51
You know, there is a sense of Farscape about some of the visuals.

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