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October 18th, 2010, 11:42
Some more because now I can't stop finding jokes that neither party can get angry over




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October 18th, 2010, 13:27
Seeing what happened to this thread I can only say that the main goal of most text is too affect people, in one way or another and it obviously does. You could see DTE's text as a parody ( which is also a kind of humor ), because as most people know there are a lot of people in US who worked really hard ( like 90 hours a week ) with poor pay, and they were hurt the most by the crisis, while the rich lazy people who take airplanes to work everyday, merely had to slightly lower their standard for a few months.

That is in my humble opinion the biggest drawback with a society of huge gap… and china is building an even worse version of that BTW…. it won't work in the long run.
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October 19th, 2010, 01:01
Well, I feel bad that I threw a hissy fit and derailed this thread, so in atonement I'm going to post a version of the kind of political humor that now gets chain-e-mailed—like dte's parable—just to show the difference between thirty years ago and now. It's a very crude letter that I had given to me when I first moved to Oklahoma, and while it's very simple, rural humor, and I suspect pretty old(some of the jokes are ancient) it's got everything in modern politics that stirs people up: Family values, sex, business difficulties, abortion, and religion. It's obviously making fun of Democrats, nonetheless, I don't find anything mean in it, and it's got its funny side if you don't mind a lot of barnyard references.

DEPUTY COLLECTOR OF INTERNAL REVENUE

Dear Sir,
I am a lifelong Democrat and I just received your letter in regards to the taxes I owe you. You say the bill could have been paid off long ago. Well, I will try to enlighten you.

In 1907 I bought a new sawmill on credit. In 1909 an ox team, a timber cart, two ponies, a revolver, also two fine razorback hogs, all on the installment plan.

In 1910 the mill burned down and did not leave a damn thing. The ox team got scared by a coyote and tipped the cart into the river, the revolver misfired while I was cleaning it and shot one of the hogs, one of the ponies died and I loaned the other one to a son-of-bitch who starved it to death, then I joined the church.

In 1911 my father died and my brother was lynched for horse stealing, a railroader knocked up my daughter and I had to pay $88 for a doctor to keep the bastard from becoming my relative.

In 1912 my boy got the mumps and they went down on him and the same doctor had to castrate him to save his life. Then later I went fishing and the boat turned over and I lost the biggest catfish I ever saw. Two of my boys were drowned, neither one of them being the one that was castrated.

In 1914 I burned out and went to drinking. I didn’t stop till all I had left was a Waterbury watch and kidney trouble. Then for some time all I did was wind the watch and piss.

In 1915 my wife ran away with a bootlegger and left me a pair of twins for souvenirs. Then I married the hired girl to keep down costs but we had trouble in bed. I paid the same doctor $45 for advice and he tole me to create some excitement at the right moment, so that night I took the shotgun to bed with me and at what I thought was the right moment I stuck the gun out the window and fired. My wife had a stroke, I ruptured myself, and I shot the best cow I ever had.

In 1916 I decided to try again so I bought a manure spreader, a John Deere binder, and a threshing machine, all on the installment plan. Then along came a cyclone and blew everything into the next county. My wife got the clap from a traveling salesman, my boy, not the one that was castrated, wiped his rear on a poisoned corncob, and the farrier accidentally made a steer out of my best bull.

Now at the present time you say you can cause me trouble. If it cost a nickel to crap, I’d have to throw up. Trying to get money out of me would be like trying to poke shit up a wildcat’s ass with a toothpick. But you are sure welcome to try.

Yours for more credit,
Joe

PS You may be a Republican. I may be a Democrat, but we can still get along. I’ll hug your elephant, and you can kiss my ass.

(I cleaned it up just a little, but I couldn't clean it up too much because it wouldn't be the same.) So, peace offering, and like the politicians say, if I offended anybody, I apologize.

Where there's smoke, there's mirrors.
Last edited by magerette; October 19th, 2010 at 01:28.
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October 19th, 2010, 11:18
Funny

Here's mine:


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October 19th, 2010, 21:29
Originally Posted by skavenhorde View Post
Edit: Got rid of that lame joke.

There's a reason ads like these died long ago:


Speaking of old ads:
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October 25th, 2010, 14:33
Hopefully this won't create quite the uproar the last one did.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg untitled6.JPG (212.1 KB, 78 views)

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October 25th, 2010, 23:36
Not funny, either.
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October 26th, 2010, 08:26
Ah, the new challenge; finding a Dem with a sense of humour!!

If God said it, then that settles it!!

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October 26th, 2010, 21:17
Oh I have a sense of humor, but not for mean spirited jibes against people hit hardest by fallen economy, while the wealthy get richer, and corporations and wall street post record profits by cost cutting rather than creating new jobs.
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October 30th, 2010, 18:23
I'm sooooooo glad this thread is alive and kicking. I thought maybe it had been shot, kicked, stabbed, shot again, set on fire, thrown out the window and then shot one more time just for good measure as I leaned out the window.

Nope, instead we have more jokes. Can't people find jokes that aren't just about Democrats/Republicans? Don't Republicans/Democrats have any other enemies out there? How about North Korea, China or hell how about some jokes about the real enemy to all Americans, Al-Qaeda. No jokes about them I see. Just lame ass jokes about Democrats or Republicans. I'm pretty damn sure Americans have more enemies out there than each other.

End rant and end this damn thread.

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October 30th, 2010, 23:20
Skav, don't you understand that both the Dems and the Repubs ARE a joke!!

If God said it, then that settles it!!

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October 30th, 2010, 23:57
I'd amend that a bit. Far left and right Dems and Repubs are a joke. I respect both Dems and Repubs……rational dems and repubs.

By making fun of either of them on a place where a lot of people with opposing points of view come to is not a very good idea. That's my point with this. Political joke making is all fine and dandy on its respective sites where like minded people go, but I wouldn't go up to someone whose ideals are different than mine and make fun of them. It's just wrong and hateful.

Making fun of someone playing JRPGs is ok since this is a site for roleplaying games, but the P&R forum should stick to debating its topics instead of belittling people for their beliefs. At least with debates you can have a…….somewhat…..reasonable discussion with people from varied backgrounds about politics. With this there is no reason behind it other than to glorify the differences.

Let's put it in perspective. Would I go into an Irish Catholic bar and start telling jokes about the pope? No, of course I wouldn't. I respect these individuals in the bar. They might have different ideals than myself, but I'm not going to rub it in their faces. I would however joke around with my friends about the pope since we are of like mind concerning that topic.

Anyways, that's my point of view on this and the sooner this thing dies the better.

Oh god….sorry about the long and less ranty rant this time. But these hate images are getting annoying as hell. I mean really annoying since DTE wont stop posting his nonsense. Try some other target for a change. Like I said before China, North Korea, Saudi Arabia or Al-Qaeda.

Thanks for the laugh Corwin, I really mean it. I'm getting a clearer picture of where exactly you stand. You stand in the best place in the house, as an observer. It really must be funny to read some of these threads in the P&R forum.

Edit: Was a little tired last night. I stayed up really late to watch Stewart and Colbert's Rally For Sanity. Loved it, but was a little silly at the end of this thing so I edited it out.

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Last edited by skavenhorde; October 31st, 2010 at 06:56. Reason: Tired
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October 31st, 2010, 06:52
Being a non-american observer is actually the best with threads based around american things since I have absolutely no bias at all; I hate ALL politicians equally!!

If God said it, then that settles it!!

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November 1st, 2010, 12:44
Hey, Skav, with all due respect, this thread isn't required reading for you. If you don't like it, don't read it. Or better yet, post some of your own if you think I'm on some character assassination binge. The majority of my recents offerings came from the Time Magazine Cartoons of the Week articles—not exactly Mein Kampf.

How about some equal opportunity?

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November 1st, 2010, 16:32
DTE, how many problems have come from this crap? Don't you wonder why or even care? I care that people might get offended about this BS and go elsewhere. Whatever happened to having an actual discussion? There used to be mile long posts in the forum about politics and/or religion. No one ever changed their minds about their politics, but at least they were somewhat civil.

The point is, do we have to rub peoples' noses in our differences in the worst possible way?

As for myself, I really don't give a rat's ass what you post, but glad to see some equal opportunity

I still think the sooner this thread dies a horrible screaming death the better.

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I'm still just a rat in a cage.
Last edited by skavenhorde; November 1st, 2010 at 17:18.
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November 1st, 2010, 17:09
A woman and a man walk into a bar. The bartender asked: Are you together ?

The boy replied : Hell no!
The girl said: Sir, we wouldn't be together even if the the world came to an end and we were the last people on earth.

The bartender, appalled and shocked of their answers asks: Why the hell would that be?

The girl replies quickly but with a sigh: Don't you know? He's a Commie!
And the guy sneers at her: You filthy Capitalist!

.
.
.

Replace Commie/Capitalist by desired counterparties : e.g. (Japanese/Chinese, Democrat/Republican…)

BTW, this is what happens when you do engineering, you learn how to make things modular, so they work for different options.

This way Skav, you can make jokes about everything

Also, it's 3.40AM, forgive me if this isn't funny. I'm not sure what is or not right now…
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November 1st, 2010, 17:16
I like that one DTE! Although I think its government that's boxed in by partisanship, not your average couple who is boxed in by the screwed up economy…
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November 2nd, 2010, 08:56
I found US is a big joke by itself… they keep promoting democrazy yet US has the most limited democratic system of all the "democratic" countries I know. How about looking over that? it is really time to change to something better!

They are the "richest" country in the world, yet they keep borrowing lots of money from poorer countries.

They have the biggest military in the world, but they can't win a single war.

To Be Continued
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November 2nd, 2010, 11:19
I agree with GothicGothicness on those points.

"Vote on A or B" sounds like "Do you prefer the King or the Queen?" more than democracy to me.

The Soviet Union had GULAG's, the United States had GHETTO's. The gulags are now gone. That's good. Changing opinion is a good sign that someone have a brain.

I disagree with GothicGothicness on one thing, the US did win the war against science. 3 generations after the moonlanding the LHC is in Europe.

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