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March 13th, 2019, 18:56
As always you guys have given me more than know. You see I know I won't be homeless forever and capt. You're right. I don't really see myself as that it's just when people see me they don't see me. They see what they are either afraid could happen to them (I've had a few come up and tell me exactly that. In California right now housing is through the roof and doesn't look like it will calm down anytime soon, but I refuse to leave. I was born here, left once for Asia and like hell will I leave again.

Actually I have work to do here as in this rebel has finally found his cause. I mean even now at my lowest I have found my purpose in life. I should have known it would be something like this because I was born to protect the unwanted, the losers, the misfits because I am one of them and like hell will I not do anything about it.

So now you've got the story of what HAS happened now it's time to really understand just how nuts I truly am. I will not sit idly by where some of these people think they can treat me differently than their regular customers. You guys gave me back something that with all that has happened just recently meaning fighting this fight is long and draining when I can only get about one thing done a day because it takes very long to do anything when your only transportation is the bus.

I could whine and bemoan my life, but that isn't really me. You've seen me here when I get pissed I get a little ………not myself and would argue til I was blue in the face or rather red on the fingers to make mu point. I have to apologize for that. I am a born fighter (Who knew?) and I was fighting over things that reallh didn't matter. I mean I was fighting for different ways of seeing a computer game. That isn't what my fury needs to br unleashed upon.

No my anger and fury at injustice needs to be channeled into something that can actually make a difference and now thanks to my new faith in God I know exactly why I had to go through all that I've gone through. Starting from the very beginning I see now I was being forged into a weapon to help. My whole life has been filled with pain and fear and I know why now.

I had to go through that to give me the passion I have in me for things I truly care about and goddamn it if I don't love all humans. If I could forgive my grandfather for what he did to me then that means I can forgive anything and help those that want help.

With that said here is what I've been planning. First you saw the article I was in with Mike the director from SOS. Well we have very similar goals and is willing to give my crazy ideas a shot. I'm creating a video showcasing SOS and all the good they do. They neat the hell out of anywhere else I have seen because all the others have some kind of hook in it. Like the churches oh they'll help, but every single one of them only help as long as they get their hook in you too.

Red Cross. HA. They make them leave there every single day no matter what. Robin my partner in crime out here on the streets (Not literally I haven't turned to stealing), but when I do his biography and all he has gone through some of you may see why this man is so special. He had a broken leg that the doctors told him to stay off of or he would lose it and the bastards at the red cross still sent him out ever day. No flexibility. Then there is these sober living places, ummm I don't need that I don't need to be seen as a drug addict since i'm not homeless because of drugs but something not of my own doing. I did nothing to cause this disease to strike me.

I don't know if you guys know this about me I value freedom above all else. I will sleep on the streets before I go to a place that I do not need to go to. I don't do drugs I am freaking disabled assholes.

Affordable housing is sort of out there, but of course every city doesn't want to have us living withing their golden city. I had no idea Californians were so bigoted before. I always befriended any race because I grew up with D&D and to me calling someone a different race just because of the color of their skin was freaking idiotic. Different races are like Dwarves, Elves, Halflings etc. Humans no matter their freaking color was still a human.

Yes, I really am that naive.

I will be doing a video on SOS highlighting how different they are from everyone else, then 2nd thing I'm doing is my journals and later on my autobiography. I've asked enough people to know that I have led an interesting life and here I thought I was extremely boring.

3rd I am doing the biographies of certain people I meet out here. They stand out from the herd and shine. I call them diamonds. We get barraged with negativity from the news well I'm countering that by doing all I can to help people see that the world isn't as bad as they think. Life really is heaven or hell. At first it was hell because that's all I saw, but just changed my perception and became more positive then all of a sudden Life is heaven. Seriously even now at my lowest most of the time it's heaven, most of the time.

4th thing I can't say but it's a book on something. I have an editor and someone who will turn it into an app after I am done.

I'm sorry about the long post again and I'll be posting some excerpts from the books to see what you guys think of it if you don't mind. It is my job ro remind people that the homeless are their Aunts, Uncles, Mother, Fathers, Cousins, You. basically to remind people that we were them not too long ago basically trying to get people to see we are human.
--
Despite all my rage.
I'm still just a rat in a cage.
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skavenhorde

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