Return of the Daily Smile

Just a little comic that's based on the new XBOX always being connected just to play games.
at_comic530.jpg

I can see this happening. I really can. Hook the user base and never let them go. Welcome to the EA machine coming to a future near you.

That bastard is a genius. I'll take one.:)
 
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Good one Cp. :) I am sure one of their execs has thought of it already. :biggrin:

Ok a few of lifes little truths for some of us here: ;)

A 'late night' now ends at 11 pm.

About half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief".

All you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.

All your favorite music is in the bargain bin at Wal-Mart.

An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee!

Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.

Getting a little action means you don't need to take a laxative.

Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.

Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.

It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
 
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No, that's just normal life for Cm!! :)
 
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@ Thrasher........Unfortunately those are getting way to close to my norm lately. :lol:

If we don't laugh about it the alternative is just blahhhh.

Corwin I was thinking of you when I read it..........:mwahaha::cm:
 
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Ah, always thinking of me!! :) Unfortunately, most of those do apply!!!! :(
 
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This one is for CM and others of that vintage: :)


Birds of a feather flock together . .
And then crap on your car.

A penny saved is a
Government oversight.

The older you get, the tougher
It is to lose weight, because by
Then your body and your fat have
Gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find
Something lost around the
House is to buy a replacement ..

He who hesitates is probably right.

Did you ever notice: The Roman
Numerals for forty (40) are 'XL'.

The sole purpose of a child's
Middle name is so he can
Tell when he's really in trouble.

Did you ever notice: When you
Put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS'
Together it spells 'Theirs....'

Aging: Eventually you will
Reach a point when you stop
Lying about your age and
Start bragging about it.


Some people try to turn back
Their odometers. Not me, I want
People to know 'why' I look this
Way. I've traveled a long way and
Some of the roads weren't paved.

When you are dissatisfied and
Would like to go back to your
Youth, think of Algebra.

You know you are getting
Old when everything either
Dries up or leaks.

One of the many things no
One tells you about aging
Is that it is such a nice change
From being young. Ah, being
Young is beautiful, but being
Old is comfortable.
 
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This one is for CM and others of that vintage: :)
...
When you are dissatisfied and
Would like to go back to your
Youth, think of Algebra.
....

Which makes me wish to go back even more.

pibbur who agrees that 1 is not a prime number. And who just bought a book about infinity
 
Hey, I love Algebra; when I was teaching Maths, it was my favourite strand!!
 
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Don't know if women find this funny, but anyway, I rolled on the floor, laughing. :lol:

 
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Don't know if women find this funny, but anyway, I rolled on the floor laughing.

I had a hard time remaining seated on my chair. Waiting for dinner. Hmmmmm. Options….

Pibbur who maybe will ask the wife and his daughters about the funniness from their perspective.

EDIT 1: Wife found it funny, but not of ROFL grade.
 
Last edited:
Well I'm back with another comic enjoy.:)

at_comic532.jpg
 
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Short scene from the planners of the new D&D movie:

Setting: Battle field..........Five heros..................20 orcs descending on them.

Warrior....draws sword.
Cleric buffs group
Thief draws weapons.
Mage readies spells
Barbarian...draws weapon

Orcs attack:

Enemies are standing face to face:

Warrior pulls out dice and rolls 2 on hit..
"crap....barely cut you"

Orc rolls: 14 on hit
"put a hurt on you with that one"

Cleric rolls: 15 on heal
"Ha ha...he won't even need a band aide"

Mage grabs dice:
"I want to kill something, I am taking my roll now"

Orc grabs Mage by the hand:
"Our turn you looser"

Barbarian pushes Orc....thief gets knocked down.......Mage jumps and hits Cleric.....Warrior grabs Dice......

Warrior yells: "That's it.........every time we try this you guys screw it up. I am going home!"

End of movie
 
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How many do you connect with?

1. My parents taught me about WEATHER.
"Your room looks like a tornado hit it."

2. My parents taught me about RELIGION.
"You better pray that comes out of the carpet."

3. My parents taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."

4. My parents taught me about OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

5. My parents taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, I can take you out."

6. My parents taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in the world who don't have wonderful parents like you."

7. My parents taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when we get home."

8. My parents taught me about GENEOLOGY.
"Shut that door... You think you were raised in a barn?"

9. My parents taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids... I hope they turn out just like you!"

10. My parents taught me about LOGIC.
"Because I said so, That's why."

11. My parents taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until your spinach is gone."

12. My parents taught me about IRONY.
"Keep crying. I'll give you something to cry about."
 
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John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick.
His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.
One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases.
It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy,
their 11 year old son, returned home from school.
Tommy was over 2 hours late.

"Where have you been?
Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?" asked John.

"Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy,
knocking him completely out of his chair.

"Son," said John,
"this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school."

"We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie." said Tommy.

"What did you watch?" asked Marsha.
"The Ten Commandments. " answered Tommy.

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him,
knocking him off his chair once more.

With his lip quivering, Tommy got up,
sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied.
We really watched a tape called Sex Queen."

"I am ashamed of you son," said John.
"When I was your age, I never lied to my parents."

The robot then walked around to John
and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said,
"Boy, did you ever ask for that one!
You can't be too mad with Tommy.
After all, he is your son!"

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha
and knocked her out of her chair.
 
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