A Return to the Era of Incline - Old Games Revisited

[Falksi]

Cool! Be interesting to hear if the Megadrive version is any better.

Here you go mate, it's probably worse :lol:

Sword of Sodan - Megadrive

So yeah, I remember seeing this for the Megadrive and thought that the sprites & graphics looked mint, and that it was worth investigating. Thankfully, Mean Machines reviewed it before I had chance to purchase it, and it got panned, so I avoided it.

I mean it really is a nothing game. Other than the meaty main sprites, that's it, everything else is woefully dire. The animation on those sprites is terrible, in particular the laughable shuffle which the main characters employ to move forward. The sound too is, again, nothing. Just a bunch of grunts & birds tweeting with no in game music and precious little else.

But the combat, dear lord this is bad. It's a bizare tippy-tap, shuffle along, hit & hope bag of bollocks. Yet again, there's hardly anything to it at all, and progression requires no thought, no skill, no test of reflexes, no test of dexterity etc. it's just a case really of how much boredom you can endure before you decide to give up, as you bash one button and push on.

After around 3 playthroughs I dropped the difficulty to easy (something I rarely ever do) just to see how far I could get, and if the game held anything more of interest later down the line. I made it to the end of the 3rd level where two giant blokes have at you from each side, and thought "fuck it, I really can't be arsed anymore".

It really is as if they started making the game, nailed the big sprites, then thought "fuck it, let's just release & sell it on the back of those rather than finishing off the actual game"

Dog shit.

1/5

 

[Pongo]

Yeah that's how I felt about the Amiga version. Maybe I was generous with a 2…

 

[Falksi]

Chase HQ 2 - Megadrive

The original Chase HQ was something of an iconic game amongst me & my mates. It was well known, but quite rare to find. Gimmicky? Yes, but that small little spin of having car-combat really made it stand out at the time.

And with this game, it still does. The racing sections are ropey. Not awful, but the civilian cars are all over the place, and some of the track layouts are frankly bullshit. A fair few times you'll encounter sections where hitting something - be it a car, lampost, barrier, whatever - is unavoidable. The way the road moves underneath you slightly feels off too. But then it gets really exciting when you go into "chase" mode and start smashing the shit out the boss. It's incredibly satisfying when you land 3 or 4 hits on them in quick succession.

You can finish the game in 15-20 min, and there's nothing to see after that. So I'd have it down as OK for a quick blast. Won't rock your world, but will get you a rush on for a few min.

:3/5:

 

[Falksi]

Double Dragon - Master System

^ouch! right in the tits!

Another iconic game from my youth, Double D's were legendary amongst us then youth, and we're not just talking about big tits . The arcade version was where it was at, but when this came to the Master System it was one of the games which sold me into getting one.

Returning to it now and, after 30 odd years of quality gaming I shouldn't be enjoying it as much as I am. But I am. Despite sprite flicker being very offputting at times, and there being very little variation in enemy attacks, it does more right than a lot of beat 'em ups 10-20 years later. It's got a surprisingly large array of moves for such an early beat em up, and I was actually more satisfied with them than when playing the recently reviewed Brawl Bros on the SNES. That said, the flying kick is clearly the stand out move, and it's one most folk will end up spamming at some point.

Now it's rare that things such as infinite continues help a game out, but in this game it does. See the action is very "messy", in that you really do just button bash away, a more tactical/thoughtful approach does little, and the opposition often get blows in to you between your blows. It goes against gaming logic, but I guess in a weird way it's more realistic. Real fights are scrappy. So because you've infinite continues you don't really care or get frustrated, you just keep bashing the shit out of things. And here that's fun, and it works. It shouldn't, but it does.

It looks good, the enemy HP is absolutely spot on so that they feel noteable, but aren't bloated so you get bored, and the short sharp nature of the game (4 levels, taking about 15-25 min to finish) mean it's still a superb dumb button masher to this day. It's as dumb and mashing as these games get, but if you're looking for a way to kill 20min with a mate it's perfect

4/5

 

[Pongo]

Never played the Master System version, but it sounds good. The arcade version was certainly brilliant - and a great music to boot!

 

[Falksi]

Never played the Master System version, but it sounds good. The arcade version was certainly brilliant - and a great music to boot!

I had a ton of fun with it. It's a big departure from the arcade version, but a fun game in it's own right. They were smart recognising the system's limitations, and designing it appropriately. I also find the style of sprites (Abobo especially) very charming.

Same can't be said for the Megadrive version though. They went for the a much straighter port, and - whilst it looks the part - it plays crap..........

Double Dragon - Megadrive

This game obviously needs no introduction, and I've already passed opinion on the SMS version. I never owned this version as a kid, because by the time it was released on the Megadrive, which was in 1992, I already owned Streets of Rage for the same system, and Final Fight for the SNES. I always planned on adding it to the collection at a bargain price, but never actually did.

And tbh, I'm glad I didn't. Whilst it's technically a closer conversion to the arcade than the SMS version, it lacks some key elements that made the arcade version so good, and I still prefer to play the SMS version in all honesty.

The sound FX are one of the main culprits for the dip in quality between the arcade version and this. Simply put, the FX are fucking wank, in particular the punch & kick sounds. It sounds real lame, and takes away a ton of the meatyness & satisfaction. Each blow feels apologetic & girly, and it really is surprising just how much it affects the game overall.

But worse yet the gameplay is really choppy too. There seems to be a lag at certain points between hitting one of the attack buttons, and the character executing it. Say I'd press punch 6 times, sometimes I'd only see 5 actions, with a significant pause in the middle of that. You should be hitting like a Hurricane, but instead it's more like a wet fart. In fact on the whole, executing moves in this version feels a significant amount trickier than in the SMS & arcade ones. The entire feel of the attacks are fiddly, sluggish and unresponsive, with little fluidity or any type of smoothness to your movements.

It's a real shame because they did a decent job with the graphics & music, but I found it more of a chore than fun, and still much prefer the SMS version.

2/5

 

[Falksi]

Breath of Fire - SNES

It's easy to romanticise about this era of gaming. There were some definite classic RPG's that were birthed throughout it, but there were also a shit load of games which had 1 or 2 key elements drag them down & made them a fail.

BOF is definitely the latter to me. It's got a fair few nifty things going for it, but ultimately it's the same generic hero tale told via countless random battles which bog the game down heavily. Not only do you encounter a scrap every few steps, but the scraps themselves aren't short either, they can usually last for a few min at least.

There's not really much more to say about it because that's all this game really boils down to. Nice graphics, nice setup, generic plot & too many battles which are too long.

:2/5:

 

[Falksi]

F-Zero - SNES

MODE FUCKING 7!! Oh the jizm we spilled as kids over the magic of Mode 7. I remember first seeing this and being totally blown away by it, no chance it can still do that now Shirley?

Well, not quite, but it comes very close. And it does that because it has this wonderful balance of elements all dancing around your senses as you play. The dynamic graphics are very colourful draw you in big time, the game feels fast & exciting with excellent controls responding to your inputs superbly, and the music grabs you right from the off too. Real great example of that 16-bit "Pow!" factor which made it such incline.

Additional more unique racing elements such as ramps, energy pit stops, exploding cars, a track exterior which drains power, each vehicle having a very distinguished character etc. all add up to make for a very exciting, very different & very fun little racer. You're always on a knife edge because you can be having the perfect game, and clipping another car sightly or judging a jump wrong can send everything into chaos, and end it in seconds. It can make you quick to anger, but it rarely feels cheap or skanky, and creates a great sense of tension.

I've only a few gripes with the game, firstly no matter how well you do the opposition is always right behind you. It just makes the game feel a little bit artificial. They're also fairly invulnerable, and never seem to get destroyed by energy drains, or being knocked off the track. Again, just adds to that artificial-ness.

But the gameplay is so sweet and so good, that it still remains a classic, and a game everyone should own. It's short lived, and there's not much to return to once completed, but what's done is just done so well that you've got to play it.

:5/5:

 

[Falksi]

Captain Commando - SNES

^"Hi, we're generic none-threatening bad guys. Hit us slowly"

A conversion of the arcade game, Captain Commando was released in the arcades 2 years after Capcom's successful Final Fight, and it's most memorable feature were the more outlandish selectable characters which were a slight departure from the normal Beat Em Up characters at the time. I vaguely remember playing it in the arcade, but never had a go on the SNES port.

And having played it now, I'm glad I saved my money. Before Streets of Rage 2, most BEU's of this ilk relied on very few moves, and a fairly simple selection, which in turn meant the other external elements such as graphics, enemies, speed, satisfaction etc. played a bigger part in the appeal & keeping you interested. Sadly, Captain Commando is pretty shit in all said departments.

It looks lacklustre, has a-typical baddies ripped from every other BEU, feels sluggish as fuck, and knocking the fuck out the bad guys isn't satisfying in the least. It all feels so far behind your button presses, and you don't get any remote pump on when twatting the enemy. There's simply no "Pow!" or "Wow!" there.

It's not unplayable and those who warm to the original main characters may find some appeal in it, but I couldn't even be bothered to finish it.

They say that the arcade version is far better, so I'll play that at some point.

:2/5:

 

[Pongo]

Yeah that doesn't sound too good!

How are you choosing which games to play, Falksi? Are you working from a list of just going in at random?

I've got some "haven't played in a long time" games I might have a run at, but I also quite enjoyed just picking Sword of Sodan at random from Antstream.

 

[Falksi]

Yeah that doesn't sound too good!

How are you choosing which games to play, Falksi? Are you working from a list of just going in at random?

I've got some "haven't played in a long time" games I might have a run at, but I also quite enjoyed just picking Sword of Sodan at random from Antstream.

A bit of both really mate. I'm working through them alphabetically, but I also play games with the missus & tend to just throw odd ones on which I fancy playing too at the time. The alphabetical system is really just to try and keep track of things a bit.

Main reason I'm doing it is because my health's quite poor, and I'm limited to what I can do life-wise now. I also tire very easily, so more taxing, in-depth RPGs & suchlike are far harder work (which is why a lot of the 30-60min quick blasts suit me so much currently).

Just go for it mate. No real need for any system or anything. I just find it really interesting how games hold up today, and like hearing opinions on them, especially from those who can take off the nostalgia goggles (which I try too).

My own personal goal is to have a final list of how I view all the games after playing them now. I've loved how returning to some has really opened my eyes to how average/bad they are, and how others have been surprisingly better than expected.

 

[Falksi]

The Chaos Engine - PC/Amiga/SNES

^This dude bums kids and the game makes no apologies for it.

This is one I used to see, hear & read about ALL the time, but it always eluded me. I think I played it pissed up one night on my mates Amiga, but was too hammered to retain any lasting impression from it.

So the first pleasant surprise are the inclusion of stats & RPG elements. Quality. No wonder the Incliners loved this back in t'day. Not to mention the great steampunk vibe and great selection of characters too. These little details really add to the flavour of a game, esp from that era, and count for a lot. Not only are the characters a very original slant on your usual character selections, not only does each feel unique, but every single one is a prestigious white Alpha male. It would drive SJW's mad if released now, 6 characters and not 1 "diverse" one amongst them. Hell even the Priest is played perfectly with his description containing the advice "His perverse nature is not to be trusted" as pictured above.

Getting down to the nitty gritty of the gameplay and it's good. Plenty of action in there yet, enough elements to prod the grey matter & keep you thinking a bit too. It's certainly a game which requires forethought, and sees you survive longer if you think ahead, rather than just relying on reactions that's for sure. It controls well enough, enemy respawn rates keep you on your toes but don't bog you down, and the way the 2nd character influences the game is significant enough to make it more than a gimmick.

There are a few kickers in there though. Firstly, it does suffer significantly from hidden attacks often hitting you from out of nowhere. Yeah you can memorize stuff, but unless you play super-cautious you'll take a fair amount of damage which it's hard to see coming. Also, the chaotic nature of the levels works really well to a point, but it can get a bit too confusing & tedious at times too. Not a major issue & in keeping with the game, but I did have to stop to take a breather here & there. Finally, it's no major thing, but I personally miss the sound of any protagonist gunfire. It doesn't really harm the game per say, it just makes things feel a little less satisfying, in fact the sound FX on the whole are a tad weak.

So a very good game & which is also full of flavour. Not quite everything it's hyped up to be, but a damn fine blast, with enough character & uniqueness to stand out from the crowd.

:4/5:

 

[Pongo]

I never played the Chaos Engine, despite having an Amiga. I remember everyone raving about it at the time. I really should give it a go - it sounds like it holds up well.

 

[Falksi]

I never played the Chaos Engine, despite having an Amiga. I remember everyone raving about it at the time. I really should give it a go - it sounds like it holds up well.

It's definitely worth trying mate, and still good fun. The more I played it the more I missed the satisfaction which good sound FX give, but the game itself does still hold up well enough to be worth playing.

 

[Falksi]

Ghostbusters - Master System

Massive on the nostalgia factor this one. Xmas 1988 and I'd spent 3 months spunking my pants in anticipation of the Master System arriving to upgrade my BBC Micro. Bundled with the system was Hang On, Safari Hunt, and a wank hidden little snail maze game. All fun enough, but the main game I got with it as a separate purchase was Ghostbusters. I spent pretty much all day from opening the pressie until bed time playing the hell out of all the games, but with Ghostbusters seeing a good 70% of that gaming time. It drove mi mam fucking mad. See the game opens with the Master System's best effort at recreating the Ghostbusters theme tune, but that's it, that's the only track you get, and It's played over & over & over & over. The perfect game to drive your parents nuts.

So how does it fare now? I don't know how much the nostalgia factor is influencing me, but I still enjoyed it. It's a strange game that's for sure, simply because it combines so many unusual gameplay elements, and doesn't do any of them particularly well tbh. It's a racer with crap racing sections, it's a shooter where the shooting sections are really simple, it's even got strategic elements regards slowing ghosts down + navigating the map & planning routes. Individually most are a bit pap in all honesty, but the strange mix of elements all blend together well enough to create something greater than the sum of it's parts, because you're constantly engaged & feeling pressured to stay on top of things.

It is a relief when you finally just get to zap some ghosts in the last 2 stages, and it's a big shame that those 2 levels couldn't have seen an inclusion in the main game. I'd have loved for there to have been that extra bit of variety when busting ghosts & seeing it switch from trapping them to just blasting them much like the stairway level. But it manages to create a real nice sense of pressure as you race against time & ghosts to build & keep enough money to enter the final stages. It's actually a very clever game for an 8-bit console, and it's no wonder a 10 year old kid would think it good.

There's not much to return to, and it's weird because as mentioned the actual gameplay is a bit pap & very basic really. But constantly having to be on your toes and having ghosts to chase is just great fun. Bit of a crappy game which manages to still be a fun experience. Like watching your favourite B-movie which has an edge of cleverness.

:4/5:

 

[Pongo]

I used to love this on the c64 - a simple but very entertaining game. Timing your run between the Marshmallow Man's legs to get into the final skyscraper was particularly memorable (/annoying ). The c64 version was probably my introduction to digitised speech as well I think.

Did the master system version have the weird thing with vacuum cleaners? You could buy one and stick it on the bonnet of Ecto1, which for some reason meant you could hoover up the ghosts in the driving sections:

 

[Falksi]

I used to love this on the c64 - a simple but very entertaining game. Timing your run between the Marshmallow Man's legs to get into the final skyscraper was particularly memorable (/annoying ). The c64 version was probably my introduction to digitised speech as well I think.

Did the master system version have the weird thing with vacuum cleaners? You could buy one and stick it on the bonnet of Ecto1, which for some reason meant you could hoover up the ghosts in the driving sections:

Yes mate, it's basically the same game. The C64 version looks really good too, and I love the "Ghostbusters!" snippet of speech you mention

 

[Falksi]

Coach K Basketball - Megadrive

Read a lot of praise for this but never played it. Despite being a bit of a midget (5'8") I used to play basketball as a kid and excelled at it because of my ability to jump really high (couldn't slam it in but could touch the ring rim and tip it in, just like a dwarf homo), yet I could also retain the ball well because of my low centre of gravity & physical strength. So I used to take a lot of interest in Basketball, and it's amazing that I never got to playing this before.

Having played it now though, it was no great miss. I get the praise, it's done really well & holds together as a basketball "sim", but as a game itself it's just not that much fun tbh. Traffic is often too one-way in favour of whoever's on offence, and the way your computer controlled teamates interact with you feels off at times.

I think a lot of people will actually like this, but after years of playing NBA jam & getting used to the OTT gimmicks which came with it, this just feels flat to me. I want those balls to slam against the rim, and with this you ease it in softly instead. Meh.

:3/5:

 

[Falksi]

Choplifter 3 - SNES

^"Hey! Look at my chopper!"


The original Choplifter was a bit of a fave of mine back in the BBC Micro days. Rather unique for a shoot 'em up, it certainly stood out.

Playing Choplifter 3 now and it's a very Marmite game. The strength in shooters of this, and most, eras is the intensity & hi adrenaline fuelled thriveathon. Choplifter works well in itself, it's just quite awkward really. Progress tends to be made by repeatedly flying at an enemy & shooting them, pulling back for another run, and then having another go. It's just a bit repetitive and boring.

I gained more enjoyment from thinking of it as a neat upgrade on a BBC game which I used to play. But once the novelty factor had worn off, the repetitive structure, repetitive combat, and general lack of punch and umph lost me.

Not one for me anymore though I'm afraid.

:2/5:

 

[Falksi]

The Combatribes - SNES

Big fan of this back in t'day. I never owned it on cart, instead it was one of the first pirated games which I owned on the SNES copier the UFO. It was one of the few which loaded fully too. Bit apprehensive returning to this, really didn't want it to be shit.

And it wasn't. In fact it's still fairly fucking brilliant. Even though the basics are the same fundamentals at the core of most side scrolling beat 'em ups, and even though there's a lack of additional moves to use like grabs & specials etc, it's still got enough unique elements & is done well enough to suck you in.

Firstly the action itself is done superbly. It's very fast & you're constantly at it. There's none of this chase enemies off screen as they back off slowly bollocks, it's a constant exchange of blows, with positioning & re-positioning key to success. You also have some great moves to use when an enemy is downed, including smashing their head into the ground several times & grabbing them by the ankles & spinning round with them, the latter is particularly useful for crowd control. Then you've a VS mode which, whilst nothing spectacular at all, just adds that little bit of extra spice once you've finished the games. It's a good touch being able to play as stage bosses, and get a feel for them too.

It's also SUPERBLY paced. Levels are relatively short, but it works so well in this context. You probably fight around 8-10 enemies, then on to the boss, no fucking about. And HP bloat only becomes apparent late game too. These small details, combined with the constantly full on fighting action really make for a great intense beat 'em up, with some rocking tunes too.

Quality bitesized scrapping.

:5/5: